What’s It Worth, Really? A Mom’s Nonexistent Paycheck

Time for me to bitch and whine. It’s 9 AM and I am well into the third week of taking care of the kids on my own with minimal help from Michael. That’s not to say he doesn’t want to help, but right now he’s tied up with a paper he’s got to finish writing for a major conference he’s attending in August.

Said conference is being held at Disney World, of course.

There are times when it just doesn’t pay to be a mom. Now is one of them. I’m busting my ass to take care of two kids and the house, while Michael runs off to work every morning to kill himself over this paper. His work is important - it pays the bills to say the least. My work is important - nobody else is going to scrub toilets, change diapers all day, and clean dirty underwear. So why is it that Michael gets to go off to Disney World on his own for a week while I continue to wallow up to my armpits in dirty toilets and poopie drawers?

You can’t pay a mom to do her job. There just isn’t enough money in the world. For the past three weeks, I’ve had to put both kids to bed by myself most nights. It’s not easy convincing a three-year-old to take a bath when you’re walking around with a six-week infant latched onto your breast. I mean come on, I’ve only got two arms.

In an ideal world, Michael would stay home in the evenings to bathe Cassie, read her stories and put her to bed while I sat in my glider nursing a baby who is determined to chew my nipples off. In my dream world, I would bathe Cassie, read the stories and put her to bed while Michael nursed Sam and tried to determine if our health insurance pays for nipple replacement. Not gonna happen though, is it?

What really ticks me off about this is that I do have work to accomplish outside of the kids and the house. I have a story that needs to be written and two drawings in progress. I have a 3D illustration that I’ve been struggling with for weeks now that I’m only finally beginning to make any headway on. And yet, how much time do I get to spend on any of these projects? Almost none. Yesterday I got to spend five minutes writing before Cassie came skipping out of her room declaring that nap time was over and she wanted to play, thus putting a premature end to my plans for the afternoon.

I know one day the kids will be off at school and I’ll have plenty of time to work. Until then, however, I am on unpaid maternity leave. I hope someone somewhere appreciates that fact.